So much has changed my friends. in SUCH a short time. The "passing" of my dad and Disability Retirement has made a such remarkable difference on my life. But I am doing well. If you want to stay in touch, please leave an email. Too many toxic people out there in the world to keep this blog freedom of speech going. I will miss it. But I stay in contact with many longtime friends via FB and email.
Beautiful sky this morning and I had to run out and grab a picture. The sun hasn't shined here for a while, so I thought it was a good sign and ran to grab my REAL camera. Besides, even though I didn't make any resolutions, one thing I HAVE wanted to do was rekindle the passion I have for taking pictures. Sooo.... I put down the camera phone and picked my Nikon and this is the first picture of the day ;)
I'm all set for the festivities! This is the first year ever I can just stay in through whatever snow might come. It's too cool for comprehension. I have goodies stocked and QVC was once again my friend. I can't wait till Christmas morning to see what I got me!! ::laughing::
Honestly though, the relief of retirement and steady income is amazingly helpful to the anxiety level. Truth be told. But I earned it. I made sure that NO MATTER WHAT I was gonna get 30 years so I could retire with health insurance. That's the big deal these days and I know how quick they add up... so I ended up with 30 1/2 years. Cool.
Anyway.. I'm trying to decide what to have for my Christmas dinner. Leaning toward ham and mashed potatoes. Another iron treatment tomorrow and dentist next week and I'll be free to just stay home and enjoy ;) Can't wait! I've been very, very good this year and I hope Santa noticed ;)
I think I have the swing of retirement. Amen and Praise God. Hey, the truth, is the truth. I have the grace now of enough time to get the iron treatments I need and what a difference they make! As does a weekly B12 shot. I knew I hung on to my job to get to 30 years for a reason. Just sayin'. I am blessed.
I haven't had much to say because I've been in the clutches of dental work. Fun times. But my last toothache was no joke so I'm keepin' on top of things.
Update - I had to share this happy thing - Here I am, just have recently gotten so involved in hooping (taking classes now) - and on my Birthday - I pick up a Happy Meal and this is the toy in side. Hoop spins when you wind it up. Had to share ;D
Now this solar eclipse will come by to provide excitement and new elements of positive change. You may also change your appearance now in a stunning way, as gradual changes within your personality and outlook may finally bubble up to the surface. It is logical that when we see ourselves differently, it would later translate into a new way of arranging our appearance or style of dress. Spirit drives manner, attitude, and eventually, looks. You are now standing on the cusp of a whole new cycle, and you can choose the direction you would like it to take. The closer your birthday falls to November 25, the more eclipse this month will affect you.
Honestly. Did ya all eat enough? I did... then today I put the leftovers in the freezer for another dinner, but it was a pretty darn good day after the parade finally got started. *grin*. I think for Christmas I'm just doing snacks though ;) And I'm still workin' away at the hoops. They are my muse. I can't do anything fancy yet - but I did just get a 4 DVD set to show me the moves, so I'll have something to do during the LONG winter we're about to start. ::sigh::
That's it for now. Just learning to be a retired person, and learning how to live in the moment. Lookin' back over the posts of the past few months, I find it hard to fathom how quickly and profoundly a world can change. In the blink of an eye. And I think I'm on the right side of MY path now.
I'm addicted. To hoola hooping. Also called cardio hoop or hoop dancing. I just picked up enough tubing today at the local home store to make a hoop for every day of the week. It's totally amazing how much playin' with these hoops helps my anxiety! No directions or stress... just plain exhausting fun. It can be just a couple of spins or a half hour of practice for one trick. No rules. But I just can NOT hoop and be mad or worried... those things float away. I put on some good music and end up grinning and proud of myself for each little accomplishment. Especially the one where my jeans fit ;D
So there ya go. Of course I have pretty colored tape coming in the mail so I can make my own hoops. Picking the colors is part of the fun ;D and I'll post pictures soon.
I am feelin' so good I just don't have the words to explain. With my vitamins all up and the workouts - and so many of the stressful issues of the past are over and done - it's sort of like a dream. A very cool dream.
PS and by the way, ya just never know when a little encouragement from an internet friend can change your life in such a positive way... but it can and I'm thankful.
But I guess I'm not a quitter. I know it's been a while, but I've been busy gettin' healthy. I won my Disability retirement And Disability SSDI - both without a lawyer and all by my self. I will be proud of that 'till the day I die.
The only thing I can tell you today is that the doc is workin' on building up my vitamins, and I'm learning hoola hoop. I swear. Thanks to my friend Kath ( Kath, leave a comment and your url, I'm not able at the moment ;D). Anyway... a lot of vitamins later, the new doc has me on a good path and I'm havin' fun at my baby steps of cardio hoop. (oh heck, now I gotta find a good link, but I just so happen to know one and here it is : )
So. I won my disability retirement, then, since it was instigated by my work but not for THAT reason, I also won SSDI. My only one goal now is to be healthy. Finances are no longer a worry and Pilates and Hooping seem to be doin' the trick and I'm smiling.
I am SO, SO blessed. God is good. Every day.
Check this out - hooping (NOT ME) http://youtu.be/bI1MNY77fdk Get Excited ;D
We gotta take what we can and enjoy. May God bless us, every one. Amen.
This was my iphone pic of the day yesterday from my front door. This morning is a whole nother story - dark, cold and rainy. So I thought I'd just remember yesterday while I drink my coffee. I'm feelin' Grrrreat today. Huh. Who'd have thunk? ::laughing:: Well, I did get started back on my vitamins and got my blood work done to work on the anemia - so it won't be long until I'm back to the Pilates. God is good.
Most of my big "life hurdles" are behind me... only a little ways to go now - but I need to get a good head start on just learning to enjoy each and every during the times both good and bad - ya just never know. Too many people close to me have been passing lately. Gotta start remembering to look up and be thankful.
Anyway, that's all. Just thought I'd take a moment and share. And be grateful. And I am.
I haven't been blogging much - VERY mucho paperwork/notary/copies/certified mail needs to happen when you're retired at 50. (Deleted portion deserves its own post.)
I do believe it's all done for the retirement situation and the numbers are correct. I just stayed low, hunkered down, paid my bills and put my food on a credit card until the storm was over. But now it is... and they owe me a CHUNK of money ;)
And soon enough friends - my actual retirement adventures may begin! Was invited to an AWESOME pig roast this past weekend and I went. SO glad I did. I needed to get out and it was a really cool party - tons of people - a couple kegs, huge fire and a roasted pig - what else do I need to say? People set up tents in the backyard so there was no driving and most were college kids with stamina. Remember those days?
Anyway, I finally figured out a girl cannot live by bologna sandwiches alone - and tonight shall be a celebratory feast! Ham steak, sweet potatoes, actual vegetables!!! I mean - thatssayin' a lot!
So now that the financial numbers are looking WAAAAYYYYY much better - I expect to have a lot more to talk about soon ;)
And I am profoundly and abundantly blessed - even if I don't realize it until the very last second sometimes - Sometimes the good Lord saves me from myself.
Pepperoni rolls in the oven. This is try #2, #1 was epic failure. So this time I bought some pizza dough, wrapped up some stuff, added egg washed and now baking till they look done.
So the other interesting thing today... when I pulled into the bank drive thru - I saw a guy laying in the front yard of the bank. Under the shade tree. Weedeater laying next to him and his fingers laced behind his head.
Me at drivethru: You know you have a guy laying in your front yard, right?
Me: Well he is. Full on stretched out.
(I can see her thru window, she said something to people inside because another guy started mimicked how the guy was laying out there since apparently he saw him too, but didn't say anything).
Her: We'll check into it.
Well, it took them a hell of a long time. I mean, what if the guy was HURT instead of drunk. Huh? What then?? He could have rolled onto the pavement! I stayed for several minutes. The weedeater was turned off thank goodness, because he rolled over on it. I never saw the people come out of the bank but I finally saw the "yard man" hunch himself up on one elbow and I figure he'd be all right.
His job? Maybe not so much, but what was I to do? I had to tell. Poor guy.
I get addicted to watching them. Any and all. Most likely because a mens max prison was my first "real" job. I pretty much grew up there, working from age 19-30 before moving on. Anyway... I'm always fascinated. So I was watching one a little while ago and it was talking about a mans last meal before execution. And it made me think.... Sad as it is, I think mine would be:
a piece of KFC chicken and coleslaw
a piece of good cornbread baked in a skillet with lots of melting butter on top
and strawberry shortcake made with angel cake, not biscuits
And now. I am STARVING. Feel free to add to my list ;D
I'm never gonna have clear focused pictures. I only have use of one eye (sorry LONG TIME blog friends, I never told ya about that before. sorry. I should have but now I did.) And the vision in that eye is 20/550. I wear glasses, but I fear I'm never gonna have a sharp enough eye for stock photography. But it is what it is and I enjoy it. That's why the colors are what draw me.
And again, and again, I am abundantly blessed. Amen.
I am. I've worked around the house all day and I don't care that it's not yet dark, but a shower and bed aren't too far away. I've pretty much been puttering around and gettin' my routine down. Hard to believe it's only been two months since I retired... but oh how great it is. Even when I'm bored - I'm still very grateful. I guess I thought that with the end of work would also come the end of the disabling anxiety. I was wrong. It's there just different but I'm working on it and that's the best I can do.
Tomorrow my project is a big one. I'm finally gonna figure out that giant rug shampoo thingy that I bought some time last year. The carpets have been patient but I think they've reached their limit. I just HATE having to sit down with something and pay attention and figure out directions. It's worse than eating liver or spinach. The trouble is that I also have NO CLUE about the workings of ANYTHING so I tend to put it off because I KNOW I have to read the stupid directions. And this is why I've had a carpet cleaner for a year that I haven't used yet.
Next week I have a hearing that's a big one and determines a large part of my future. Think good thoughts for me please.
And now I shall toddle off like an old lady to prepare for night before the sun goes down... and besides.. THIS old lady still has a hangover from yesterday. I don't get out much but when I do... I apparently can overdo!!
Yup, I got plenty - come on over. Until then you'll just have to put up with these random thoughts as I sip my third cup.
Splenda might be better for ya, but Sweet n Low is MUCH better tasting, in my opinion.
My lawn looks beautiful and it's gonna be such a beautiful day out there it's likely to hurt my eyes.
As I opened my new refill of pain med bottle this morning, realized doc upped the strength and never hold me. Huh. Thank God for different colors.
I'm thinkin' about takin' myself out to eat today. I even know where, just not when. We shall see.
The cats are now finally back to normal after my week absence. Big kitty has stopped her hissing and has finally come into the living room. At this moment they are back to their usual racing over and around this house and God help them that gets in the way. Hmmm... maybe I need to go away again.
Did I tell ya about the dream I had the other night? If I told ya, already - never mind, I left my groom at the alter. He was everything a woman could want. Thoughtful, honest, etc. Perfect. Except when we got to the alter a) I realized I didn't want to be married again. b) I suddenly realized he was a foot shorter than me and c) I couldn't remember his damn name! Two days later and I'm still laughing about it because I remember that dream clear as a bell and I almost never remember my dreams.
So there ya go. Three cups of coffee down and I'm ready to get busy.
I know.. I've been lazy. And busy. I hope ya'll are surviving the earthquakes and hurricanes. I was on a mountain top for the earthquake - I could HEAR that thing. It was awesome in power even though technically it wasn't very big. I just figured it was my dad rolling over in his grave. Just sayin'.
So I got back from the WV holler just head of the storm, perfect weather for the whole drive. And with the help of Sirius XM radio, I have recently started to enjoy long straight drives. Something good to listen to is as important as good weather to me. Things are good.
I love goin' to that mountain. It always restores my soul and I feel my dad everywhere. Anyway... I took some purty pictures down there and maybe I'll post some later. Gonna rearrange my computer desk for today's project. Wish me luck!
Apparently for most of the month, which means a sluggish and unproductive time. Spot on. I'm a month into my retirement now and settling in. Not much to blog about just now. I've gotten used to taking long naps and not feeling guilty. Not wearing a watch or setting the alarm, although I often still wake up with that anxiety... There was no way in the world I could ever have worked 5 more years until my normal retirement under the conditions I was put in. I know in my heart of hearts the stress would have killed me long before then... but no matter now because at the very last second, He scooped me up and I am free.
But this retrograde thing. I don't seem to have much ambition for anything and no real goal at the moment which seems to be a pretty common theme out the in the internet universe. I'm pretty sure that's a clear signal to sit back and relax. And I think I shall. But when it's over... look out! ::laughing::
And I am blessed.
PS - I'll make SURe to take a pic of my next sidewalk/road chalk masterpiece. It was kind of fun!
It looks like a storm is coming. I think I'm gonna take my sidewalk chalk out there in the road and create a short lived masterpiece. When I'm done, I'm pretty sure it will a good thing the rain is coming to wash it away. Just sayin'.
The lawn looks lovely and the house isn't so bad either. It's a beautiful day out there. Somethin' about gettin' up early in the morning that I just love. Sometimes I go back to bed and sometimes I don't *grin*.
Now that the major shock of being retired is getting settled in my head and body, a lot seems different. I have more aches and pains - at least that I feel now that I'm not completely sedated 10 hours out of every day - but I'm workin' it out and it's getting better. I can't say my anxiety is completely gone, nor have I gotten rid of the Xanax completely, but it's a whole lot better and that's more than a girl can ask for.
I'd say I'm doin' pretty A-OK, all things considered. I think I might get out my kite flyin' stuff this afternoon.
It's time for a new blog banner. And I know that somewhere, some awesome person told me how to make one. And I saved the directions but now I can't find them, but it seemed very easy at the time.
I'm havin' trouble coming up with the right thing... I mean, I only got this idea about a few minutes ago. I always have been impulsive. ::laughing::
I'll figure it out, but any ideas that would "suit" me would be good.
Another recent discovery is that when a girl is home all day, she tends to drink more coffee than she might have when she worked. Just because it doesn't cost $3.95 a cup is reason enough. Anyway, I digress.
I'm about to get out that new hand held steamer I bought for myself a few Christmas's ago. It's brand new but now I have the time to use it! See? There was a method to that buying splurge last year! Look out little kitties.... I might be a danger ;D
It's all cool. The air is fixed. Amen. What a great day today! I saved up all my "to-do"s and did them today while I was a bright and sunny 78 degrees. The breeze was nice too! I've got a doc appt. comin' up in a week or two. I think my blood pressure meds need to be lowered now, Praise God. I just never knew it could be like this... and I know people don't really like me to talk about it unless they are retired too, and I try to keep the happy to a dull roar, but have Mercy it is a life change!!! I would have it that everyone could retire at an age young enough to enjoy it because whether it's the way it was or something new - there surely is a lot to enjoy.
The AIR CONDITIONING GUY! Geeze... get your minds out of the gutter. Anyway, he spent many an hour and replaced most of my ventwork and ducts... but the air is finally working. I may need major sedation when I see the bill... but it's all coooollll... *grin*.
So now, let the festivities begin. The cats even moved today! They haven't done much during the heatwave but there was nothing i could do. I was glad to see them feeling better today, and I do too.
Gettin' up early and bein able to go back to bed if I want is lovely. It's still hard to believe and I keep on thinkin' I'm just on vacation *grin*. This morning I got to sit and watch a big 'ole thunderstorm while I sipped on a good coffee and yesterday I met friends at the lake.
I blog just cuz I like to.. and it keeps me sane. (Sort of.. hehehe). There's a whole lot of wonderful people out there and they don't all live on my country road. How else is a girl supposed to make friends? *grin*
So I'm 50 years old, retired and I have two cats. Get over it.
I miss my dad like crazy. Willard Cottrill and beloved dad 10/20/2010... The last REAL mountain man there's ever gonna be, and I'm more proud than words to be his oldest daughter. You were my heart, dad... rest with the angels. Your honor and dignity WILL be restored.